Thankful

Well, damn.

No sooner than I clicked "publish" on my last post about my oldest brother not making an effort to see me on my visit to the US, both Ben and Frankie wrote to tell me to get over it.

They reminded me of the many posts on forgiveness that I've written about, and compared to those, implied that my most recent one was dripping in hypocrisy.

OK.  They didn't say it like that, but that was the gist of the message.

I thank God for my guys because they wasted no time calling me on the carpet.

And, of course, they were right.

Although it wasn't something I wanted to hear, it was something I needed to hear.

I have held on to these negative feelings for far too long.  The only thing/person that was guaranteed to change in this situation was me, if I was mature enough to do so.  It's a choice I had to make to make this right, or at least better.

So, like when I had to let go of ill will in reference to my ex-husband, I made the overture.

As with him, it doesn't matter if my brother and his wife respond, or what the response might be.  I did what I needed to do to move on.

You know, I could save myself a lot of grief and a ton of embarrassment, if I didn't share so much,  but I do it in the hopes of helping someone to avoid the mistakes I've made.

Who knows?

Maybe it simply is just TMI (too much information).

Anyway, like I said, I'm thankful.

For my guys for setting me straight, and for a great trip home.

And, as always, I'm thankful to you too, for taking this journey with me.

20,482

This number represents the miles traveled this month on my journey from the UAE to the US, and back to Abu Dhabi.

I added up the miles when, for the second year in a row, my oldest brother chose not to make it (across town last year, or the 75 miles or so this year), to see me. The distance in miles from Abu Dhabi to London to New York City, to San Francisco, and to Houston is 11,627.

By my calculations, I traveled far more than halfway to see him.

Of course, he had excuses each time.

However, he was neither deathly ill, nor was he running from the FBI.  These being the only valid excuses in my book.

He called to say he couldn't make, but he did remember my birthday (August 5th). That should count for something, but somehow it rings hollow.

It would be easy to blame his wife, who is "wicked" personified, but this failure falls squarely on him.

I realize that there are times when it's easier to ignore family and friends to keep the peace in relationships and marriages, but when you see yourself being coerced/forced and isolated from your world (your Mom, Dad, brother(s), sister(s), or friends), something is wrong with that picture.  Unless, of course, your world was filled with illegal or immoral things, but that's another issue for another time.

What I'm talking about now is control.

Having a mate who totally and completely controls what you do, where you go, and who you see, is madness.  Loving someone means trusting them.  When that trust is violated, make some noise, work it out or walk away.

Don't stand in the way of someone seeing their family because you're pissed at them, and by proxy, their family.

That solves nothing, but only compounds the problem.

Instead of trying to keep your significant other away from their family, encourage them to see them, even if you don't go.  Don't be the reason they drift away.

For me . . .

20, 482 miles was a long way to travel to be stood up.

The Luck of the Irish

Greetings from Dublin.

I made a quick stop here to break up the long trip from the US back to the UAE.

I was out and about today and took a lot of pictures, but they can not capture the charm and beauty of this very lovely city.

It's old, but well-preserved and incredibly quaint.  It seems to be made for walking. Many streets were covered with pedestrians.

The people that I met have been so warm, friendly and helpful.

The Irish that I've met in Abu Dhabi are some of the nicest people you want to meet, and they seem to be a true reflection of this country.

My morning started late, as I was recovering from the all night flight from Houston. Once up and about, I hopped on a tour bus and marveled at the views of the city.

I ended my tour at the Guinness, St. James Gate Brewery, where the world famous beer is made.  It sits on 62 acres, and is truly massive.  It takes up many city blocks.  The tour itself was a bit disappointing.  I was hoping to see the actual process of how the beer is made.  I assumed it would be like the wine making tours of Napa, but it was not.  Basically it was video tour with a huge souvenir shop at the end.  No matter.  I had a good time nonetheless.

I opted to walk back to the hotel from the brewery, maybe 8-10 blocks.  It was a lovely stroll.  The temperature was sweater weather, like San Francisco, about 65 degrees.  Absolutely perfect!

This is a place I'd like to see again.

This is right outside my hotel window.

The sign is hard to read,
but it's for The Old Jameson Distillery,
founded in 1780 and active until 1971.

Street view

Street view 2

These are online photos that captured what I saw.

Another online photo.

This is in the heart of the city.

Impressive government (?) building

Beautiful monument in the heart of the city, too.

One of the many pubs

Another stately building

This guy's shirt says,
"Drinking doesn't cause hangovers,
Waking up does!"

I found this picture online.  It was better than mine.

Also an online shot.

This is inside the brewery.  It was founded in 1759.

This is an incredible man-made
rushing waterfall in the brewery.

Barrels of beer in the brewery.

This is also in the brewery.
I think it's suppose to represent a glass of beer,
but I could be totally wrong.

This church has the highest steeple in Dublin.

A close-up of the church above.

Who Knew?

That cows like music, or more specifically, trombone music?

They start to show up at the 1:18 mark.

Fascinating.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qs_-emj1qR4

Impressive!

Actually, impressive doesn't begin to describe this young man and his accomplishments thus far.

Watch the video clip.  It is well worth the five minutes.

http://www.upworthy.com/a-senator-tells-this-student-not-to-be-nervous-this-student-smiles-it-off-and-blows-everyone-away?c=upw1

Cool Shoes

These shoes are featured in the August issue of Oprah magazine.  They're ballet flats in school colors.  Sixty-three colleges and universities are represented with the schools' insignia on the bow.  My school wasn't listed, but I found the right colors and bought a pair.  They're well made and really comfortable.

Just in time for football season.

I know.

I know.

I'm working on weaning myself off football.

Enjoy the shoes while I deal with my guilt.

http://www.lillybee.com/u-of-miami/

The Godfather and the Reverend

I always wondered about the relationship between the late Godfather of Soul, James Brown, and the Reverend Al Sharpton.  The article below sheds some light on it.

http://www.theroot.com/articles/culture/2014/08/james_brown_al_sharpton_interview_on_his_relationship_with_the_singer.html?wpisrc=newsletter_jcr:content&mc_cid=ccde52ccc2&mc_eid=ac9b7800d4

Hangin' in Houston

Yesterday I saw a dear friend who I've known all of my life.  We were next door neighbors.  She is a week older than me.  Her folks had two boys and she was the first girl, so there was serious excitement when she was born.  A week later, the scenario repeated itself.  My folks had three boys, and then I came along.  Word is, they were pretty excited when I arrived, too.

Isn't it interesting how easy some friendships are to keep, no matter the length of time between chats or the distance between you?

That's how it is with Betty.

We don't miss a beat.  It's like we're still in the back yard talking over the fence.

The older I get, the more I appreciate this kind of friendship.

Here's wishing you the richness that true friendship brings.

As promised, here's some pictures from my summer travels, thus far.

I'm in front of the Space Shuttle.  This is at NASA in Houston.

The 747 that the Space Shuttle rode piggyback on.

This is the ceiling of Bubba's, a fabulous Houston area restaurant
featuring shrimp dishes.  Note that it's made of doors.

Me at the Kemah Boardwalk.

The coolest little building that sits on a corner
by itself.  It's a law office.  It's in Kemah, TX.

Zadie and I being silly,
on our way to Prospect Park in New York City.

This is my niece Alisha, Zadie and I in Harlem.

Milu is holding new shoes.  Baby girl is already a serious shopper.

Having fun with some of my dear Sac friends.

Balance

Balance.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately.

The importance of having balance in our lives.  In our relationships.  Both personal and professional.

The example that readily comes to mind is balance in marriage.

I see it like the scales of justice.

There is the man and the woman on either side, each contributing to the alliance. Some days the scales are tipped way off in one direction or the other, but overall, they are balanced, with each making a meaningful contribution overall.

This is not deep philosophical stuff I'm referring to.

This is easy.

Simple.

Yet, critical to maintaining the balance in a relationship.

For example . . .

You cook.

I clean.

You wash.

I dry.

You take care of the kid(s).

I clean the house.

And of course, vice versa, in each of these examples.

Here's what I know for sure.

It's not the big things that causes relationships to fail.

It's the little things.

The stuff that causes it to be off balance.

Like when one is giving way more than the other, and that becomes the new normal.

And when things are off balance, then what?

Does talking about it get things back on track?

If so, that's great.

But what happens when the mold is set, and discussing it doesn't bring the necessary changes, but excuses, excuses, and more excuses.

Then what?

Does the guy/gal who's carrying the heavy load (sometimes the ridiculously heavy load) stick around, listening to the excuses, knowing things are not likely to change, or do they cut their losses and bolt?

I know what I would do.

How about you?

Goodbye Sac. Hello Houston.

The week I spent in Sacramento just flew by.  It seemed before I had my feet on the ground good, it was time to go.

HUGE thanks to all of the folks (family and friends), who helped to make my Sacramento stop such a special one.

I'm currently in Houston, chillin' and relaxin' with Forrest and Jannie.  They make wherever they are home for themselves and everyone who enters their place.

Side note - I was having some issues with my computer, so while I was in Sac, I turned it in to Apple for repair.  I just received it, and I'm drafting this post on it.  The good news - it's like new again.  YEAH!  The no-so-good news - I'll have to wait until I return to Abu Dhabi to restore all of my files.  Thankfully, they're backed up.

Anyway, that's my excuse for the delay in posting.

I have lots of pictures from these trips, but it may be a minute before I go through them, so please bear with me.

More soon.

Cheers.

Ingenious

This vending machine dispenses food for stray dogs in exchange for recycled bottles.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/07/23/pugedon-vending-machine_n_5606494.html

Powerful Story

I'm in Sacramento and loving every minute of it.

Thanks Tiff, Shana, Laura, Stephan and Candas!

More on my Sac visit soon.

In the meantime, check out this video.  It's thirteen minutes long, but well worth your time.

http://www.upworthy.com/he-would-brag-to-his-fellow-soldiers-about-his-girlfriend-all-the-time-there-was-just-1-problem?c=upw0

California Forecast?

Coney Island

Here are a few pictures of Zadie (three-and-a-half years old) on our adventures at Coney Island.

Starting the day at the Famous Nathan's Hotdog Stand

Zadie enjoying the thrill.

Fire Captain Zadie to the rescue!

We've got a few more days of fun before I leave for California on Tuesday, July 22.

Oxford University, Bampton Village and Downton Abbey

My apologies for the delay in posting.  The days (in London and here in New York) have been jammed packed.

My last full day in London was on a guided tour of Oxford, home of Oxford University, Bampton Village (where the town scenes are shot for Downton Abbey) and Highclere Castle, the home used in Downton Abbey.

What an extraordinary day it was!

Oxford University, located about 60 miles from London.

One of the 38 colleges that make up Oxford University

This picture doesn't capture how magnificent this building is.

Another college

Christchurch College

More campus views

More campus views 2

More campus views 3

Centuries old cemetery beside a church in the town of Oxford

Fancy hotel in Oxford

This church is in Bampton Village that is used
for the town scenes in Downtown Abbey.
It is where Mary and Matthew were married.
It is about 90 minutes from London.

This is Matthew Crawley's mother's house.

This is a photo of Edith on her wedding day approaching the church.

This is also a photo, one of Mr. Carson and the doctor(?).

A tour group heading to the entrance of the church.

Another view of the church.

Highclere Castle.
It is absolutely stunning to see as you drive up.
It sits on acres and acres of land with nothing else around it for miles.
It backs up to rolling hills.
The direct distance from London is about 70 miles.
It took us about two hours with the stops.

I'm standing at the front entrance.
Unfortunately taking pictures is forbidden inside the castle
because it is the actual home of the Earl and Countess of Carnarvon.

Another view of Highclere Castle

The yard surrounding the castle is park-like.
Just stunningly green and luscious. 

This is the front of the castle.

Another view of the front.

This is part of the Secret Garden, found in one of the far corners of the property.

These horses were also on the property.

This guy was really friendly.

I have to say it again . . . what a day!