Quickie

It's late.  I have homework to do and you know how much I look forward to that.

Actually, I got home a couple of hours ago, settled in, and thought about doing it, but got on my computer instead.

You know, checking emails, following links found in the emails, catching up on world affairs, etc.

Basically, stalling.

Procrastinating.

Putting off the inevitable.

Why do we (OK, I) do this?  It's so much easier just to do the thing we're putting off, and yet . . .

Side note - The elevators here list the first floor as the ground floor, making the second floor the first.  Why is that?

Side note - A picture of a really fancy Starbucks located in a mall in Dubai.

OK.

Enough is enough.

I really have to go now.

No more stalling.

Good morning to you.  Good night to me.

School Assemblies

We have two assemblies everyday.  One at 7:00am for the boys, and the other at 7:45 for the girls.

Remember, although we're considered a co-ed school, the boys and girls are never together.  At all.  It is totally forbidden.

The students stand in rows with each class representing a row.  Remember too, this is a large school.  There're over 400 boys and more than 600 girls.  So, we have rows and rows of rows.

Couldn't resist that silly sentence.

These assemblies take place in one of the courtyards.  The support teachers lead the students in prayers, and songs, including the national anthem.  This is the time when staff and students are recognized.

Ninety-nine percent of the activities are in Arabic, so the Western teachers and I are at a disadvantage, especially when awards are given out.  We're never quite sure what they're for or why the particular students were chosen.

There is live music, too.  Most times, students are playing the instruments - keyboards, xylophone and drums.

If you listen really closely at about 8:00pm Pacific time, there is no doubt in my mind, you'll be able to hear the music.  It is played RIDICULOUSLY LOUD.  I feel bad for the classes that stand closest to the speakers.  I know their ears are ringing for the rest of the day.  Turning it down is not an option.  It's an uphill cultural battle.

This CRAZY, LOUD music is played during lunchtime, too.  And they wonder why the kids are bouncing off the walls.  They bouncing in time with the music.

Maybe.  Just maybe.  The music is not that loud, but my hearing is just super sensitive as I've gotten older.  Either way, one of my goals for the year is to turn the music down.

Way down.

Wish me luck.

Hot! Hot! Hot!

When I ventured out this morning, I was taken aback by how warm hot it was outside.  My guess that it was near triple digits was confirmed by my weather app. It was 103.  Every day this week will be over 100, with the highest expected to be 106.

Can't say I'm looking forward to this.

It's times like these that we really thank God for air conditioning in every building and in Luther (my car).

I'm told it hovers around 120 the month of July.  My plan is to be far, far away.

Thankfully, once I enter my school building, I don't go outside again until I'm leaving for home.  Actually, when I don't feel like taking the long route through the building, I can cut across the courtyard.  In this heat, the long way will seem like a breeze compared to the oven outdoors.

Random thoughts -

Homes/apartments/villas do not have dishwashers or closets.  You can find closets, but I've yet to see a dishwasher.  Most folks have maids/nannies/cooks, and I'm guessing they take care of the dishes.

You can't find a crock pot either.  I've considered getting one from the US, but I fear the electrical outlet difference would be an issue.  Some things work great with adaptors, others don't.

Interestingly, you can find all kinds of deep fryers.  Who knew there was a market for that?

A cool thing  . . .

Every time there is activity on my bank cards, I get an instant text message, saying what occurred and where it happened.  For example, if I buy a coffee at Starbucks, it will say "Your card ending in XXXX was used at Starbucks in Al Jimi Mall."  There is also a message letting me know when there is a direct deposit.  Great service!

I very recently figured out how to use my washer/dryer combo where it doesn't take three or four hours to complete a load.  There is a 30 minute option that washes only.  I then hang up the clothes and they're dried in no time.  This discovery was made when I read the manual.

Note to self . . . read manuals FIRST.

I'm tickled pink . . .

About a new iPhone app.  It's called "SayHi."  When you speak, it translates what you say, verbally and in writing.  It's new and didn't have Arabic.  I updated it a day or so later, and you guessed it, they had added it.  I can't wait to try it with my Arab sisters tomorrow.

Two more apps I love . . .

PackingPro which list all of the things you need to travel with and things you need to do before you leave.  You can check them off as you get things done.

Skyscanner shows you flight costs to dozens of cities around the world on one page.

OK.  One more.

World Clock.  Shows the time around the world.  When it's night time, that part of the map is shaded; when it's daytime, it's not.  I'm contacting folks in three different time zones back home, so this helps me keep track.

I have a reference letter/form to fill out for one of my teachers, so I'd better get to it. It's that time of the school year when folks are making plans for next year.

So . . . Here's wishing you a great day.

Good morning to you.  Good night to me.

Online Dating

No.  No.  No.

Not doing it.

Tried it.

For a minute.

OK.  For six weeks.

But I stuck with it five weeks too long.

Getting home, reading and responding to guys, trying to figure out how much of what I was reading was pure, unadulterated fiction . . . felt like homework.

I never liked homework.

So . . .

What are the options for a single, hot (as in hot flashes), woman to do?

Enjoy being single.

Toxic Relationships

My brother Forrest and I have just had a long, and textured conversation about toxic relationships.

What makes a relationship toxic?

Why do we sometimes stay involved with folks that we know are not good for us?

Why is it that we as parents have to guard against toxicity when dealing with our kids?  Shouldn't we be the last ones who would bring harm to our own?

Is their a difference in how we deal with toxic family members versus the way we deal with toxic friends? Is it the fact that we can ditch a friend, but we're stuck with family?

Why do we stick around though, for those we absolutely know are not good for us?

What makes us feel the need to entertain these people?

Once we have the courage to get rid of him/her/them, what do we do to ensure we're not ensnared in that web again?  Or does it become a vicious cycle of going from one toxic relationship to another?  Let's hope not.

I was in one for over twenty years.  

Why did I stay?

Because I wanted the best for my boys.

And I was willing to deal with the nonsense to make life better for them.

Or so I told myself.

Because in reality, kids suffer too, when adults are in difficult relationships.

And then, how does that affect their relationships with others?

OK.  OK.  I'm circling the wagons again.

I'll stop so you can get off.

Girls Taking a Stand

We should follow their lead.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/04/23/irum-khan-muslim-teen-hijab-football_n_1445644.html

Changes

When I opened up my blog page yesterday, there was a "new and improved" look. The thing is, I was really happy with the old look.  I knew where everything was.  I knew how to access it to make changes, etc.

Now, I'm searching.

I don't like to search.

This reminds of Target.  I loved shopping there, but until the major remodel, all of their stores were set up differently.  So, that meant searching for stuff every time I walked in a different one.

Isn't it funny how I can make a total change in my life - retiring and moving half way around the world - and that didn't bother me?

But changes in my blog page . . . that bothered me.

Why is that?

Why is it that the big changes in our lives are often easier to "swallow" and adjust to, than the little changes that we make a big deal of, that really shouldn't matter?

If someone has an answer, please share.

Side note - Have you ever known someone that lived on the edge of reality?  When they spoke, their conversations was a little . . . off?

I'm not talking about those who are mentally challenged.  I'm talking about "average Joe Blow" folks we may interact with every day.

They just see and deal with the world differently.

Not better or worse.  Just differently.

How should we respond to them?

Do we emulate them, or shun them?  Or something in between?

How do we deal with that person if he/she is related to us?

Do you make excuses for them?

Do you spend time defending them or trying to justify their behavior?

If so, why?

Is it because we feel sorry for them?  Or are we trying to understand them and think everyone else should give them the benefit of doubt?

What if these folks are "knocking on 60's" door?

Do we deal with them differently than someone who is "knocking on 30"s door?

Are we less patient with the older person?

Don't we expect more because they're older?

Is that fair, though?

Clearly, something is off kilter.

Shouldn't that count when we're passing judgement?

So many questions, and not nearly enough answers.

Al Ain Zoo

Today I was on a mission to visit the zoo.

Not sure why.

OK.  Yes I know why.

I had work to do and wanted to postpone it as long as possible.

Anyway.  These are some pictures from my walk on the wild side.

Enjoy.

The Essence of a Man

I believe that our personalities are essentially formed by the time we're five years old.  That is, the core of who you are, is already in place.

There is the molding and shaping after that, but the core of our existence has already taken shape.

In a Kindergaren class, you can easily spot the natural leader, the extrovert, the introvert, the fun-lover, the pensive one, and the risk-taker, among others.  Their personalities are already firmly in place, along with the way they see the world.

So we ask . . .

When did the cheater begin to cheat?

When did the perpetual liar begin to lie?

When did the scammer begin to scam?

Probably in Kindergarten, honing their craft as they grew older.

I know.  I know.  You're thinking, WHAT???

Hear me out.

One of my favorite movies was made ten years ago and its entitled, "The Emperor's Club."  It's about an influential teacher at a boarding school.

In it the teacher is faced with a challenging student, with questionable morals, who he mentors and takes under his wing.  The movie begins with the arrival of the class for a class reunion, years after they've graduated.  It was an opportunity for the teacher to see if what he tried to instill had taken root.

I'll stop here, so as not to give it away.  It is the moral and ethical issues that are raised in this movie that I find most fascinating.

And the question is asked again, "When did the deceitfulness take root?"  Could it have been avoided if tackled early?  Or was this their destiny, formed and shaped as little kids?

I know.  I know.  You're also thinking, I have way too much time on my hands.

What's funny is that I've never considered myself a "deep thinker."  Quite the contrary.  But in my brief time here, I've grown quite reflective.  Is that because I have more time to think, or am I taking the time to think and reflect?  Not sure.

I'm curious though . . . what do you think?  Are our personalities formed early on, filled with good stuff and/or questionable behaviors, or is this line of thinking completely nuts?

It's Ok if you think I've fallen off the deep end.  Sometimes I think that, too.

Stupidity . . . Knows No Bounds

Some folks should not be allowed anywhere near a classroom.

http://www.khaleejtimes.com/kt-article-display-1.asp?xfile=data/educationnation/2012/April/educationnation_April9.xml&section=educationnation

News

There's big news in the The National paper today about this country.  It is about this town that I live in - Al Ain - and the fact that it has been chosen to build a component of the new Boeing 777 and 787 airplanes.  It is Boeing's first supply deal in the Arab world.

Also, Sir Richard Branson's Virgin Galactic has chosen Abu Dhabi as its second spaceport.  New Mexico houses the first.

Both of these stories got lots of ink.

In other news . . .

Not sure if I mentioned it before, but the UAE has its hand in Hollywood, too, by providing funding for movies.  The most notable ones are Contagion and The Help.

In many ways, this is an extraordinary, forward thinking country, with their space-age architecture and buildings that defy nature.  They are making this the place to be in the Middle East, and ultimately, the world.  They have made home so attractive, the percentage of nationals who leave the country is very small.  There is a strong emphasis on culture and heritage and making sure the young folks are raised with full knowledge of where they come from.

That's what may account for any push back that this latest education reform may bring.  In their effort to bring international standards to their educational system, there is the fear that the emphasis on local history and customs will be lost. Frankly, I think they're right to protect that.

Random thoughts . . .

Your mobile phone number is used like your Social Security Number in the US. Every store purchase is attached to it, every utility setup, and every bill.  It acts as your account number for all of these entities.

Speaking of phones - I used to pride myself on being able to remember phone numbers easily. Not so here because there's no standard way to say them.  For example, my cell phone number is 0509174857.  We would say 050 917 4857. Some folks here would say 0509 174 857.  Others might say 05 09 17 48 57.  As a result of this inconsistency in the way they're stated, it's hard to remember.

Final thoughts . . .

I've been home for the past two days recovering from this bout of the flu or whatever it is.  I've spent most of my time on the sofa reading and watching TV.

Work will be intense for the next few weeks as we're completing the second round of staff evaluations and I have to be ready to run when I hit the door.

Yes.  You read right.  Evaluations, complete with formal observations, are done twice a year.  We have a staff of at least 125, with 75 of that number being teachers. The others are support staff.  It's only the teachers with two evaluations per year, but it's still pretty intense to get them all done in the allotted time.

OK.  Last thing.

It has been fascinating for me observing the Arab staff teach in their native language.  What is so interesting is how much you can understand about what's happening by the body language of the teachers and students.  You certainly can tell whether the students are engaged and actively responding to what is being taught.  There is an Arab Head of Faculty that goes with me to these classes and I question her about the content when we debrief.

Every day brings a new experience.

I'm making a liar out of the adage, "You can't teach an old dog new tricks."

Recovering

From the flu or stomach virus or something.

I got up as usual and went to work, but by the time I got there I knew I needed to go home.  The thing is, all absences have to have a doctor's note, so I had to go to the hospital clinic to get one.

Two hours later, with the needed sick note in hand, I was on my way home and to bed, where I stayed all day.

Thankfully, I'm feeling better.

I've learned that I have to make my health a priority.  That was sealed for me when a principal in a neighboring town in California died (was killed actually) in his office. Twenty-four hours later, it had been painted and all of the furniture had been replaced, along with the carpet.  That office, his old office, was now ready for someone new.

It was at that point that I really realized that no matter what your job, you're replaceable.

So, take care of yourself.  You're no good to anyone else sick or . . . dead.

OK.  Enough preaching for today.

Hope this finds you well.

Detroit, Criticism & Liars

There's an ad in one of the local magazines citing the excellent  investment opportunities for real estate in Detroit.

I wonder if they'll be any takers.

There's an interesting article on criticism and how it can be good for us.  It is well-written with excellent points to consider.

http://www.khaleejtimes.com/wknd/wknd_article.asp?xfile=/data/wkndtopstories/2012/April/wkndtopstories_April5.xml&section=topstories

The other fascinating article is on how to spot a liar.

Hint:  They're all around us, all the time.  Sometimes . . . it's even us.

http://www.khaleejtimes.com/wknd/wknd_article.asp?xfile=/data/wkndtopstories/2012/April/wkndtopstories_April1.xml&section=wkndtopstories

There are at least a half dozen local magazines and they are all free, or nearly free. What's great about them is the writing is so good.  Not at all like the free publications in the US.

Anyway, hope you find these interesting, too.

TEDx Al Ain

Welcoming us to the conference

Today was amazing, energizing, and thought provoking.

I'm talking about the TEDx Conference.  What an incredible collection of great minds!

The day began with us being entertained by a band playing bagpipes!  Not sure the significance of that, but it was fun to watch nonetheless.

As expected at these gatherings, the speakers came from all walks of life.  There were fifteen different folks.


There were artists.  One in particular who created things from trash.  

Replica of Dubai made out of discarded cardboard

Replica of Al Ain - Note the grassy areas.
Al Ain is known as the "Garden City."

There was an engineer responsible for promoting and encouraging studies in aviation.

There was the male Emirati Shoe Designer, who is taking the fashion world by storm.  He's been featured in the New York Times . . . twice!

There was a man who overcame tremendous physical challenges to live life as a motivational speaker.  He was phenomenal!

Sign in the lobby.  One quote is . . .
"Getting lost will help you find yourself."

There was the female physician whose passion and life's work is treating folks who are HIV Positive.

And finally, there was an eight year old inventor who challenged us to always ask, "Why?"

It was an extraordinary day.

All of the organizers wore shirts that said,
"Life is short.  Live your dream and share your passion."

One of the amazing things about TED is that all of the talks are posted online for all to experience and enjoy.  I asked and was told we can expect them in about two weeks.  As soon as they're up. I'll post the link and my favorites.


It's late and I have homework, but I'll do it with a smile knowing that today was so worth the sacrifice of time, energy and effort.

Newspaper Sermons

Forgive this double post today, but there's something I've noticed in the paper, and just had to share it.

Every Saturday, Friday's sermon is summarized.  I think this is from the Friday gatherings at the Mosques.  Not sure.  Also not sure if every speaker at these gatherings have the same message.

Anyway, I think it's interesting how we, in the US, have the distinct separation of church and state, but here in the UAE, the things of God are intertwined in every facet of their lives.

Fascinating.

Check out this week's sermon synopsis for yourself.

http://www.thenational.ae/news/uae-news/friday-sermon-count-your-blessings

What do you think?

Rain & Amazon & A Story Before Bed

The weather was really crazy today.  High winds.  Lots of blowing sand.  And the threat of rain.

This was a big deal because it rarely rains here.  The official word is four days of rain annually.  Just the threat of the possibility of rain caused the kids to get super excited.  Reminded me of snow in the South in the US.  Incredibly rare and when we saw it, it was a huge deal.

Same thing, but for the rain.

Just discovered -

An amazing app for my phone.  It is for the city of Dubai and it includes GPS Coordinates.  Remember, there are no street addresses in this country, which make finding places pretty colorful.  This app includes a map and when you press down anywhere on the map, it gives your GPS Coordinates.  Genius!

Started this yesterday.

Today is Friday.  The beginning of my weekend.

I stopped writing last night to chat on the phone with friends back in Sacramento. What a treat that was!  By the time I got off the phone, I was too tired to think.

So . . .

Another fun discovery before I left the US was lighted eyeglasses.  They have little light bulbs in the outside corner of the frames that you can turn on when you need extra light, or you're reading at night, or maybe on the airplane.  I found them at the Rite Aide Pharmacy in Sacramento, but Amazon has them, too.  Go to Amazon and search for "lighted eyeglasses."

OK.

Confession.

I love Amazon.

I know there have been issues with squeezing out other bookstores, but you can't beat the service, or the price.

But that's just it. Amazon is so much more than a bookstore.

I couldn't find Season Salt here.

Yep.  Got it from Amazon.

Vitamins.

Check.

Clothes and accessories.

Check.

Computer stuff.

Check.

Hardware.

That, too.

Since I discovered Shop and Ship, I can shop directly from Amazon and it is delivered to me in less than a week.

I could go on and on, but you get my drift.

Yes.  Amazon should pay me for this endorsement, but it speaks volumes that this is unsolicited praise.

And now for my final discovery -

"A Story Before Bed" Website.  I can't remember if I've shared this or not, so here goes.

This website, www.astorybeforebed.com, allows you to record from a library of over 500 books, and email the recording of you reading to whoever you choose.  I record books for my girl, Zadie, emailing the link to both her Mom and Dad.  They can open the email everywhere, at anytime, allowing Zadie to hear the story and see me reading it.  The books are at all levels from babies to big kids.

It's another great way to keep in touch.

Speaking of keeping in touch, have I told you lately how much I appreciate you keeping in touch with me by reading my blog?

Know that I'm forever grateful that you're taking this ride with me.

Your blogging buddy

Forbidden Fruit 2

I was in Abu Dhabi today for an all-day meeting.  Thankfully, this one was timely and relevant.  We were back at the new school with no toilet paper.  I was ready for it though.

On the way home, I passed by the grocery store that sells pork, and decided to stop by.

This is the sign above the small room that houses the porky items.

Right down the hall from this room, on the way to the main store, is the restrooms. Note the area is called "Comfort Room."

Restrooms

Totally unrelated and random is the picture below which is a section of the Main Post Office in Al Ain.

Emirates Post - Main Post Office - Al Ain

There are thousands of boxes.  This photo is of just one corner.  The boxes wrap around corners several times and there is a second floor, also with wall-to-wall boxes.  Remember, there is no delivery of mail to homes or offices.  All mail is delivered to the post office for pick up.

Other random thoughts - 

Almost all parking lots are covered because of the intense heat.  It's been hovering at around 100 degrees for about a week or so.  We're expecting it to cool down some in the next few days.

As I've mentioned before, there is only one kind of gas station - the national brand - and the fuel cost is subsidized by the government, mainly for the nationals, and all of us ex-pats benefit from the discount.  I pay between $17-$20 to fill up Luther. He's a Toyota Camry.  I rarely let him get lower than a quarter of a tank.

There is an automatic car wash at most of the gas stations.  Once the car has gone through that, it is wiped dry and vacuumed by three guys.  I love this service and get it often.  I like Luther looking sharp.

More random thoughts - 

The nationals don't wear wedding bands.  Neither men nor women.  As I've mentioned, an Emirati man can have up to four wives.  The only caveat is that he has to treat each of them fairly.  Of course, he decides what's fair, so there is the chance it might get a little funky.  

Can you imagine a guy trying to keep four women happy?  Or maybe, it's four women trying to keep the guy happy.  

It is a disgrace for women to be divorced.  Men can divorce women with simply the stroke of a pen.

From the newspaper - 

Names of folks - criminals and victims alike - are excluded from the articles.  Only initials are used.  I'm told it is because of concern of possible embarrassment to the person or their families.  

From our district website - 

Condolences are regularly published via emails to all ADEC Employees.  They read:

We extend our sincere condolences to

Our colleague / _________________________

Name of School – Abu Dhabi

Abu Dhabi Education Council

on the unfortunate loss of his Mother

May God rest her in peace and inspire her family patience and solace

This was a pretty scattered post today, but this is how my brain was working.  I've been up since 3:00am.  I woke up with a headache and drank coffee.  A cup of coffee a day helps to keep the migraines at bay.  Drinking at 3:00 this morning wasn't smart though.  I probably could have gone back to sleep.  

Oh well.

Here's wishing you a great day and sweet sleep.

Encouragement

I was listening to someone talking about how important it is to help others and oftentimes the way to do that is through encouragement.

Sometimes that looks like greeting people pleasantly, complementing folks who do a good job, or telling someone its going to be OK.

I see encouragement a lot in schools with teachers interacting positively with kids, telling them they can do it or acknowledging a good job.

We all need encouragement from time to time.  No matter how strong we are, or how independent we've become, its still important to hear that you're doing OK or that this too shall pass and everything will be alright.

It's amazing what a kind word or a friendly response will do to brighten someone's day.

Conversely, when we are negative and finding fault, it can do much to damage someone's self-esteem or confidence.  Especially in kids.

So often, when a teacher believes in a student, even when that kid doesn't believe in his/her self, that teacher's confidence in them can help to launch them on the right path.

On the other hand, when a teacher blames her students for her inadequacies, it produces a ripple effect of failure.  Heaven forbid if a child has this kind of teacher for consecutive years.  The damage can be irreversible.

Likewise, when a parent only sees the glass half empty, always complaining and only seeing the negative, it can have a lasting effect.

I pride myself on having good judgement when it comes to people.  But sometimes, I miss the mark.  Sometimes, especially if it's a negative encounter, I quickly pass judgement and move on.  I'm now beginning to stop and think . . . what's their story?  Why are they the way they are?  How can I help to change the course of a bad day?

A smile.  A friendly hello.  Remembering to thank them for their service, even when its subpar.  These are things I'm striving to do on a regular basis.

I'm hoping that encounters with me will leave folks wanting more, not running for the hills.

Forgive me for being a little preachy.  That's not my intent.  This message is for me, most of all.

Happy Easter!

Here's hoping that you all are having a wonderful holiday celebration.

Today was the first day back to work after our two weeks of Spring Break.  I had to be reminded that it was Easter because its not on our calendars.  I'm sure it was celebrated by all of the ex-pats at the local Christian Churches, but I haven't been to church since I first arrived and was searching for one.

Random thoughts -

I've noticed at each break, the stores have huge Back-to-School sales.  Kind of like what we have in late August, but they have them throughout the year.  They had one in December before we returned in January, and there was a big one last week in time for our return to school this week.

Most of the school supplies - backpacks, binders and notebooks - have American characters on them.  Like Hello Kitty, Justin Beiber, Miley Cyrus, Sesame Street characters, etc.

Also, when I was in Cape Town and visited my teacher who lived there, her son was watching American sitcoms on TV.  As I mentioned before, there was American music, particularly R & B, that was piped in most public places and spaces.

Our cultural influences - good or bad - touch every corner of the globe.

Instant communication via news alerts on my phone and computer, keep me abreast of the happenings back home.  In fact, there was a shooting at the local courthouse back home in Texas, and I heard about it before my brothers, one of whom was only a block away.

The Internet is my lifeline to the world.

Interestingly, a huge number of websites are blocked here.  We get around that by downloading a program before we arrive that uses servers outside of this country. This has been a tremendous help.  Of course, you have to do it before you arrive or when you're on holiday because the site that you would download it from, is also blocked.

I'd love to be in on the conversations deciding what's blocked and what isn't.

That reminds me of the meds here.  I'm sure I mentioned that antidepressants are very strictly controlled, whereas most antibiotics are over-the-counter.  The migraine med, Imitrex, is also over the counter. There is in fact, a whole laundry list of drugs that are absolutely forbidden.  Some of which are our common cold meds.

Fascinating, really.

I didn't sleep well last night.  I rarely do when we're going back after a break.  So, it's off to bed for me.

Good morning to you.  Goodnight to me.

Happy Easter!

Tyrone vs. Jerome

I ditched Tyrone.   My wireless router.

I know what you're thinking.   He was virtually new.

Here's the thing.  I'd been having serious Internet connection issues, and I wanted to be sure it wasn't because of the router.

So, I replaced him.  With Jerome.   Bigger.  Stronger.  Covers more territory.

Where's the loyalty, you asked?

Well, I was faced with a decision.  Do I stick with a guy for sentimental reasons . . . he was my first; we started off here in the UAE together, etc?  Hoping and wishing things will be OK?

Or do I just ditch him for a newer, fancier model?

I chose to think, and act, like a guy, and go for the newer model.

Side note - This post is just about routers.

Or is it?

Ben is a Genius!

I take it all back.  Everything I said about Ben.  Every name I've called him over the years.  I take it all back.

I emailed him that I was having computer issues, using my iPad.  Thank God for more than one gadget.  He  responded via chat that he would research the issue and get back to me, which he did.

It looked like it was going to be a long, drawn out process, so he said he'd call to walk me through it.

When he got on the line, he asked a couple of questions and then, on a whim, suggested I hit the brightness button.

People, that was it.  That was the problem.

As my friend Deb would say, this was definitely a case of operator error.

Whew!

Thank God for Ben!

So, please join me in giving him his richly deserved kudos.

Computer Issues

My brand new MacBook Pro won't turn on. The nearest service center is in Dubai. Guess where I'll be when it opens tomorrow?

Wish me luck.

Things I Learned From My Ex-Husband

I know.  I know.  You're shocked.  Me, saying something nice about Frank.  I know you weren't expecting this, but I've grown.  I've learned how to forgive and because of that, I see things clearer and my life is fuller.

So, some things I learned from Frank:

1)  How to pack; he was a master at packing a suitcase.  There was always a packed one at home while he traveled.  When he returned, he simply dropped off the one he had, and exchanged it with the one with fresh clothes.  Of course, my traveling doesn't warrant that, but the way he laid out things, is what I took away.

2)  How to spot a good restaurant;  Hint:  it's the one where there's a line to get in.  Those to avoid, the ones with no customers.

3)  Commercial airlines carry meds on board;  This knowledge came in handy when I had an allergic reaction to something on my flight to South Africa.

4)  Creating pro and con lists when you have to make a big decision;  He was very rationale, and rarely made a spur-of-the-moment decision.  He deliberated long and hard before making his final choice.

Of course . . . No.  No.  No.  I will not.  I will not.  I will not dwell on the negative side of that equation.  I will only spend time on those things I can take away and use to my benefit.

5)  Cooking, preparing and presenting food is a form of artistic expression. The food should look as good as it tastes.

I'm sure there are more things I learned from Frank, but these are the biggies that come to mind.

Although I didn't get this until the eve of my 55th birthday, forgiveness is not about the person who wronged you.  It's about you.  You forgive for you.  So that you can move on without pulling an 18-wheeler filled with junk around with you.

There's a fabulous quote from Robben Island that states,

"While we will not forget the brutality of apartheid, we will not want Robben Island to be a monument of our hardship and suffering.  We would want it to be a triumph of the human spirit against the forces of evil; a triumph of wisdom and largeness of spirit against small minds and pettiness; a triumph of courage and determination over human frailty and weakness."  -Ahmed Kathrada

Powerful.

And finally, I've learned that maturity has little to do with age.

Have you ever met a child who seemed like an "old soul?"  He/she just exuded wisdom without realizing it?

Conversely, have you met some an ole critter who makes foolish decisions and acts like a kid?

As I've gotten older, I've learned that there is world of things I don't know.  To stay informed, I must always be open to learning new things, experiencing new adventures.  If you're not careful, it would be easy to go through life on automatic pilot, just taking each day as it comes, instead of seeing the wonder that each days brings.

I like me at this age.  Do you like you?

Poem

I've never been a fan of poetry.  I usually don't get the similes and metaphors and other methods used to describe things.  It's rare when I read a poem and even rarer that I understand it.

I got the following poem.  I hope you get it, too.

The Smell of My Mother


It took me four years to gather
the courage to 
go back home 
after the death of my mother.


I never entered her bedroom.
I never asked what happened to
her pillow.


My father took their bed for himself
and I never complained.


The bed suddenly became 
his;
and his alone.


Now my father has died!
I am searching for her pillow.
But I never ask.
I never say
what happened to my mother's pillow?


He is dead now!


Why am I so frightened to
enter their room?


Maybe her pillow is still on the bed,
next to his.


Does the pillow still have my mother's smell?
I know his must have;
he just died
yesterday.


Keep their room closed.


Keep their smell there 
behind finished memories.


Is a forty-nine year old man
allowed to feel like an orphan?


Who sets the rules?
Yes
I am an orphan,
And I don't like it.


I miss the smell of my mother and
I cannot locate he pillow.


What happened to my mother's pillow?


by Dr. Ali Abu-Rahma

Headed Home

Another view of Paradise

This plant grows on Table Mountain

View from the canal cruise

The glorious week is winding down.

My bags are packed.  I've just eaten.  We're just waiting for the guy to come and get the keys and for my local friend to take me to the airport.

The beauty of the city of Cape Town is unmistakeable.  But it is the welcoming warmth that engulfs you that makes the city special.

My flight home is an all-nighter.  Never my favorite, but I'm ready to get back home, so I know it will be fine.

Just settled in at the airport.  Thankfully, the flight was delayed because I was racing from the moment I arrived.  Not the way I like to do this, but . . .

Guys scaling a wall

Trying to show heavy Dutch influence in the street names

Although I tried, the pictures don't adequately capture all of the beauty that is Cape Town.  

It really is a magnificent city.

Thanks for taking this trip with me.

Bootylicious!

Beyonce and J-Lo would feel right at home here.

This could be called the "land of the booty."  I haven't ever seen this many amble behinds before.  Women with pencil thin waists, but with booties galore.  Any man who is a "booty man" would be in hog's heaven here.

OK.  I just had to share that.

I'm guessing I've got some of my buddies already booking their flights.  It's OK.  I'm not mad at you.

Now back to the straight and narrow.

We were expecting rain today, so neither of us planned to leave the apartment.    It ended up being a lovely morning, so I decided to venture back out.  I wanted to visit the Mandela Museum again.

I walked the several blocks to the bus top, but must have just missed the bus because I waited more than 30 minutes for the next one.  Not a big deal.  The view of the water, and the glass houses, and the the traffic going by kept me entertained.

Residential Housing

I like people watching.

Once on the bus, the ride was only about ten minutes to the Waterfront.  Yes, this area is the jumping off point for many of the sight-seeing opportunities.

Remember Woolworth?

Interestingly, you can see Robben Island from the museum.  Which means all those years those men were imprisoned, they could see freedom across the shore.  How tough that must have been, to be so close, and yet so far.

After visiting the museum this last time, I strolled through the surrounding area. Enjoyed a cup of coffee, and again enjoyed people watching.  And listening to the various accents, trying to guess where the folks were from.

Striking Statues

It started to drizzle, so I cut my venture short, and headed home.

In between napping, I finished one book and started another.

Later this evening, I was invited to dinner at the home of one of my teachers who lives here in Cape Town.  It was a lovely evening.

Tomorrow, I'll be on my way back to the UAE, ending my wonderful visit to the Motherland.

Last week I read this long article in the NY Times about what a racist city Cape Town is.  I'm thrilled to report that I saw no signs of this during my weeklong stay. We intermingled with the locals throughout the week, and couldn't have been treated better.

It truly has been a marvelous experience.

Solo on the Blue Route

It's really cool today.

I'm awake early, as usual.

I make coffee, check my emails, and get some reading done.

About 8:30 I get dressed and head downhill.  I'm traveling alone today, and I appreciate the solitude.

The cafe has wi-fi, so I get online using my phone. Oh, how I miss having the Internet at my disposal.

I decide to take the second of the two Big Bus Tours.

I stopped at the first stop, the Waterfront, which is a tourist Mecca, and hung out there for a while.  Then I hopped back on the bus and we headed out to ride the water's edge of this lustrous shoreline.

Water Front

Guys singing on the Water Front

Statue made out of Coke crates

The views were breathtaking.  Reminded me of the Northern California Coastline, with its rocky boulders, and crashing waves.

Picture taken on Robben Island looking toward Cape Town

Everything was so lush and green.

Table Mountain - up close;
The cable car station is that square figure on top

Luscious green mountainside

Vineyards are big here, and the neat rows of grape vines line one of the mountainsides.  I know that neither I, nor my camera, could capture this incredible site.  It is stunning.

Mountainside vineyards

We then passed by a botanical garden, a bird sanctuary, and a stately university that is home to a recent Nobel Prize winner.

We traveled on the outskirts of exclusive neighborhoods, which were a stone's throw from a neighborhood of shanty towns.  The contrast was striking.

Shanty Town, a section of Cape Town

Side note - I really like these Big Bus Tours.  They're a great way to see an overview of the city with all of the highlights pointed out through the narrations coming from the headsets that are in at least a dozen different languages.  It's like having your own personal guide.  You can hop on and off at any of the stops to check things out close up if you want to.  Brilliant idea.

Side note 2 - The sound of R& B Music is everywhere . . . In the cafes, in every other store in the malls.  Even the street musicians mix their African beats with R & B.  Our music transcends borders and continents.

The people are charming here.  Friendly, warm, and helpful.  They're representing the Motherland really well.

Side note 3 - I seem to be a diva magnet.  Which always baffles me.  I am the most down-to- earth person you'll ever meet.  I'm a straight shooter.  And yet, somehow, divas find their way in my world.  You know, the ones who need special pillows or they can't sleep.  The ones who demand sushi when all you want is a burger.  Or the ones who can't lift a finger to get anything done that they feel is "beneath" their self-proclaimed stature in the world.

Really???

Thankfully, I escaped this lesson in becoming a woman.

Maybe being raised with only brothers, or only having sons, or having a no nonsense Mom, or coming from a really small, country town, all helped me to escape this plight.  Whatever the reason, I'm so glad I did.

Being a diva is exhausting.  Just ask everyone around her.

Robben Island

Home alone.

Thankfully, I'm in the apartment alone, thinking about the history I witnessed today.

Bridge to the Mandela Museum
 that swings open to let ships pass

Another view of the bridge

Mandela Museum
Where you catch the ferry to go to Robben Island

The visit to Robben Island, the place where Nelson Mandela was imprisoned for 19 of 27 years, was sobering.

The island is reached via ferry.  The ride is 30 minutes.  You can see the Cape Town sillouette behind you moving farther and farther away as you get closer and closer to the island.

As you gaze into the rapidly approaching distance, you see, what appears to be a community.  There are structures all around, that look like they're been there for years.  No sign of the prison yet.

Robben Island on the horizon

Once docked, we got off the ferry and boarded four large buses. This is a guided tour, so we're driven around the island, with our guide pointing out the highlights.  It is during this ride that we eventually pass by the maximum security prison, where political prisoners were held.  There are several buildings making up this section, but none of them are especially large.

Busses that took us around the island

Interestingly, the political prisoners were held in maximum security, but murderers, rapists, and serial killers were housed in the minimum security wing.  The reason they weren't together is because the government feared the political prisoners would influence and sway the thinking of the criminal prisoners.  The government feared the political prisoners more than the actual criminals.

Outside view of the maximum security wing

We then drove by the limestone quarry that the prisoners worked.  The guide described the horrid conditions under which they labored.  There is a small pile of rocks at the entrance of the quarry that was built impromptu when Nelson Mandela, and many of his political comrades who were imprisoned with him, went back to Robben Island to dedicate it as a museum.  When he finished speaking, he picked up a rock and sat it down.  Every other former prisoner did the same.  This pile of rocks has remained untouched since that time in 1994.

Limestone Quarry - Political prisoners were forced into the hard labor of breaking these rocks.  The dust was damaging to their lungs, and because of the light color of the limestone, that absorbed heat, it was blisteringly hot work, too.  There is a small cave-like opening that was the only thing they could use for shelter.

Pile of rocks that began with Mandela's

Close-up of rocks

Side note - The island is home to about three hundred people who run the museum and take care of the land and the buildings.  There was an elementary school on it until last year, when the few number of students warranted it to closed.  The students attend school in Cape Town and travel to and fro via ferry.

Side note 2 - There was a senior high school group of about eight or nine that were touring as well.  They were all from Cape Town and were a very impressive group. They asked great questions, and were good conversationalists for their age.  They rivaled college kids in their thinking.  It was refreshing to see.

Prison Tower

When we finished the bus tour, we were guided by an actual political prisoner who had been imprisoned there, too.  He served six years, beginning in 1986.

His story was a remarkable one.  He shared what life was like when he was there, and compared it to life when Mandela was in prison.  The conditions had improved, but not by much.

There must have been a crowd of about 80 of us, listening to his commentary. We're in a large room that housed prisoners in an open area, as opposed to the single cells.  There are benches that line the walls, with two sets of bunk beds on the far wall, demonstrating the kind of beds they had.  In addition, there were two narrow, rough, rugs in the middle of the floor that were used to sleep on before the prison system was forced to provide beds.

Large, open cell block;
We were sitting on the benches around the perimeter of the room

There were at least two couples, about my age, who did not appear at all interested in what was being said.  One of them were talking during the guide's message.  The guide said if they were translating for each other, fine.  If not, then he shared that they should be respectful of the message and the memory of the suffering that had taken place.  It was a powerful statement.

The two couples, got up and left.

Prison Yard

The guide saw one of the men who walked out later, as we were moving through the building, and asked if he understood English.  The man said he did.  If I was that guy, I think I would have lied.  He looked like an idiot for walking out.

The guide was very even tempered though, not getting upset, but you could see he was disappointed, hurt even.  He had lived in this hell hole, and was trying to help us to see and understand what that was like.

We then went to see Mandela's cell.  It was unbelievably small, where he spent almost twenty years of his life.

Mandela's cell

His life and time there is a true testament to the endurance of the human spirit.

In fact, the island also housed scores of German Shepherds that the prison used to help guard the inmates.  The dogs' houses were twice the size of the prisoners' cell.

House used for solitary confinement; Dog shelters are to the left and right

Prison Warden's home;
Now used as a guest house for visiting dignitaries 

Even the dogs were treated better than the men.

Then, as nature's way to lighten things up, as we were leaving, we went to see a colony of penguins that live on the island, too.  They blended in really closely with the rocks, so they were hard to spot.

Robben Island is home to 13,000 penguins

Over and over, we were reminded that it was in the spirit of forgiveness that this monument, this island, stands today.  In spite of the inhumane cruelties that were levied here throughout the years, it is because of forgiveness that the people, and it - Robben Island Museum - can exist.

Sobering thought, coming at the end of a sobering day.

I love the message on this bus . . .
We're on the journey together.

What a triumph for Mandela to leave this place, and ride the ferry into history as the first Black President of South Africa.