Hangin' in Houston

Yesterday I saw a dear friend who I've known all of my life.  We were next door neighbors.  She is a week older than me.  Her folks had two boys and she was the first girl, so there was serious excitement when she was born.  A week later, the scenario repeated itself.  My folks had three boys, and then I came along.  Word is, they were pretty excited when I arrived, too.

Isn't it interesting how easy some friendships are to keep, no matter the length of time between chats or the distance between you?

That's how it is with Betty.

We don't miss a beat.  It's like we're still in the back yard talking over the fence.

The older I get, the more I appreciate this kind of friendship.

Here's wishing you the richness that true friendship brings.

As promised, here's some pictures from my summer travels, thus far.

I'm in front of the Space Shuttle.  This is at NASA in Houston.

The 747 that the Space Shuttle rode piggyback on.

This is the ceiling of Bubba's, a fabulous Houston area restaurant
featuring shrimp dishes.  Note that it's made of doors.

Me at the Kemah Boardwalk.

The coolest little building that sits on a corner
by itself.  It's a law office.  It's in Kemah, TX.

Zadie and I being silly,
on our way to Prospect Park in New York City.

This is my niece Alisha, Zadie and I in Harlem.

Milu is holding new shoes.  Baby girl is already a serious shopper.

Having fun with some of my dear Sac friends.

Balance

Balance.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately.

The importance of having balance in our lives.  In our relationships.  Both personal and professional.

The example that readily comes to mind is balance in marriage.

I see it like the scales of justice.

There is the man and the woman on either side, each contributing to the alliance. Some days the scales are tipped way off in one direction or the other, but overall, they are balanced, with each making a meaningful contribution overall.

This is not deep philosophical stuff I'm referring to.

This is easy.

Simple.

Yet, critical to maintaining the balance in a relationship.

For example . . .

You cook.

I clean.

You wash.

I dry.

You take care of the kid(s).

I clean the house.

And of course, vice versa, in each of these examples.

Here's what I know for sure.

It's not the big things that causes relationships to fail.

It's the little things.

The stuff that causes it to be off balance.

Like when one is giving way more than the other, and that becomes the new normal.

And when things are off balance, then what?

Does talking about it get things back on track?

If so, that's great.

But what happens when the mold is set, and discussing it doesn't bring the necessary changes, but excuses, excuses, and more excuses.

Then what?

Does the guy/gal who's carrying the heavy load (sometimes the ridiculously heavy load) stick around, listening to the excuses, knowing things are not likely to change, or do they cut their losses and bolt?

I know what I would do.

How about you?

Goodbye Sac. Hello Houston.

The week I spent in Sacramento just flew by.  It seemed before I had my feet on the ground good, it was time to go.

HUGE thanks to all of the folks (family and friends), who helped to make my Sacramento stop such a special one.

I'm currently in Houston, chillin' and relaxin' with Forrest and Jannie.  They make wherever they are home for themselves and everyone who enters their place.

Side note - I was having some issues with my computer, so while I was in Sac, I turned it in to Apple for repair.  I just received it, and I'm drafting this post on it.  The good news - it's like new again.  YEAH!  The no-so-good news - I'll have to wait until I return to Abu Dhabi to restore all of my files.  Thankfully, they're backed up.

Anyway, that's my excuse for the delay in posting.

I have lots of pictures from these trips, but it may be a minute before I go through them, so please bear with me.

More soon.

Cheers.

Ingenious

This vending machine dispenses food for stray dogs in exchange for recycled bottles.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/07/23/pugedon-vending-machine_n_5606494.html

Powerful Story

I'm in Sacramento and loving every minute of it.

Thanks Tiff, Shana, Laura, Stephan and Candas!

More on my Sac visit soon.

In the meantime, check out this video.  It's thirteen minutes long, but well worth your time.

http://www.upworthy.com/he-would-brag-to-his-fellow-soldiers-about-his-girlfriend-all-the-time-there-was-just-1-problem?c=upw0

California Forecast?

Coney Island

Here are a few pictures of Zadie (three-and-a-half years old) on our adventures at Coney Island.

Starting the day at the Famous Nathan's Hotdog Stand

Zadie enjoying the thrill.

Fire Captain Zadie to the rescue!

We've got a few more days of fun before I leave for California on Tuesday, July 22.

Oxford University, Bampton Village and Downton Abbey

My apologies for the delay in posting.  The days (in London and here in New York) have been jammed packed.

My last full day in London was on a guided tour of Oxford, home of Oxford University, Bampton Village (where the town scenes are shot for Downton Abbey) and Highclere Castle, the home used in Downton Abbey.

What an extraordinary day it was!

Oxford University, located about 60 miles from London.

One of the 38 colleges that make up Oxford University

This picture doesn't capture how magnificent this building is.

Another college

Christchurch College

More campus views

More campus views 2

More campus views 3

Centuries old cemetery beside a church in the town of Oxford

Fancy hotel in Oxford

This church is in Bampton Village that is used
for the town scenes in Downtown Abbey.
It is where Mary and Matthew were married.
It is about 90 minutes from London.

This is Matthew Crawley's mother's house.

This is a photo of Edith on her wedding day approaching the church.

This is also a photo, one of Mr. Carson and the doctor(?).

A tour group heading to the entrance of the church.

Another view of the church.

Highclere Castle.
It is absolutely stunning to see as you drive up.
It sits on acres and acres of land with nothing else around it for miles.
It backs up to rolling hills.
The direct distance from London is about 70 miles.
It took us about two hours with the stops.

I'm standing at the front entrance.
Unfortunately taking pictures is forbidden inside the castle
because it is the actual home of the Earl and Countess of Carnarvon.

Another view of Highclere Castle

The yard surrounding the castle is park-like.
Just stunningly green and luscious. 

This is the front of the castle.

Another view of the front.

This is part of the Secret Garden, found in one of the far corners of the property.

These horses were also on the property.

This guy was really friendly.

I have to say it again . . . what a day!

Saying Grace

These dogs have more sense than a lot of us.

This clip is two minutes long.  Be sure to watch it to the end to see them clean up after themselves.

Pretty amazing.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=604775426257928

Hat tip to Forrest for sharing this gem.

Novel Idea

For all you men tackling the job of combing your daughters' hair, watch this clever method.  It's 30 seconds long.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/07/15/dad-dubs-daughters-hairstyle-daddys-version-of-the-bun_n_5587851.html?utm_hp_ref=black-voices&ir=Black%20Voices

The Streets of London

Wow!  What a city!

I'm not sure what I was expecting, but London has far exceeded anything I hoped for. It truly is a magnificent city.  There are few places I've been that I want to return to, but this is definitely one of them.

???

Random Building

Street corner

My favorite - The telephone booth.  Still in use!

This is "The Eye."  It's like a ferris wheel with 32 basket.
Each one represents a borough in London.

Big Ben

The aqua-colored image in the distance is a horse's head.
I'll work on finding a better shot.

I'm racing to the airport.

More when I'm in NY.

London Bridge

I just arrived at my hotel this morning about an hour ago, after an all night flight.

First impression of London - it's a beautiful city.  Warmer than I expected.  Public spaces are blooming with flowers throughout the city, creating an urban garden-like atmosphere.

The buildings remind me a lot of NY, particularly Manhattan.

Below is a picture of the Tower Bridge, I think.  I'll confirm that later.  This was taken from my hotel room.

I'm too tired to venture out today.  I plan to catch up on some much needed sleep, and explore the city tomorrow.

More soon.

Headed Home

Tomorrow I'll be headed back to the US.  I'm excited to get back to see family and friends.

The trip last year was painfully long (seventeen hours!), so I decided to break it up with a stopover in London for a few days.  It's just over seven hours from here, and New York (my first stop) is another seven hours or so.

Check out my traveling playlist.  If you receive these posts via email, I think you have to visit the page in order to access this feature.  The address is www.followingfaye.blogspot.com.

More soon from the road.

  

MJ Covers - Part 2

A couple of weeks ago, I posted a blog about the many different folks/genres that have covered Michael Jackson's music.  Thanks to Forrest, here's another one.

I wonder if these guys thought of this before or after they drank all that beer.

Enjoy "Beer Bottle Billie Jean."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NkbZlautuUc

Agree?

Best Soul Food Restaurants in the US?

http://www.theroot.com/articles/culture/2014/07/best_soul_food_national_guide_to_top_restauraunts.html?wpisrc=newsletter_jcr:content&mc_cid=81a67bd266&mc_eid=ac9b7800d4

The Pot Calling the Kettle Black

This is the fascinating story of a Washington Post reporter who was covering the crack addiction of former Washington D. C. Mayor Marion Berry and the devastating effect this epidemic had on the whole city, while he himself was addicted to crack.

http://www.npr.org/2014/07/03/327824529/addiction-battled-ambition-for-reporter-caught-in-d-c-s-crack-epidemic

Great Commercial

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xwndLOKQTDs

Happy Fourth of July!

I was reminded of the speech that Frederick Douglas gave on July 5, 1862 entitled "The Meaning of the Fourth of July for the Negro."  Although given 162 years ago, it continues to resonate in our world today.

Granted, we've made extraordinary gains, but the legacy of slavery lives on.

There is a powerful message in this speech.  I encourage you to take the time to read it, and then pass it on.

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/aia/part4/4h2927t.html

By the way, was this included in your US history lessons?

I'm guessing the answer is no.

Let's Play

Dog can't understand why this man won't play with him/her.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/07/02/dog-tries-to-play-fetch-with-statue_n_5552270.html

Our Stories

Karyn Parsons, the actress who played "Hilary" on the Fresh Prince of Bel Air, has founded a company that creates videos for kids highlighting achievement in black history.

Check out her story and the stories she's creating below.

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/798791271/the-janet-collins-story-presented-by-sweet-blackbe

The Power of Our Passport

I've noticed there are many places that I've traveled where it is relatively easy entering the country, where I didn't need a visa, or could get it when I landed.  Not so for many others holding passports from other countries.  The map below sheds light on this phenomena.

http://big.assets.huffingtonpost.com/GOOD_Passports.png

Lovely Idea

This is a clip of a do-it-yourself coffee shop that doesn't have employees and uses the honor system for paying.  It proves that given the opportunity, most people will do the right thing.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/30/the-vault-coffee-shop-honor-system_n_5543914.html

School's Out

The last day of school here was Thursday, June 26th, but the students stopped coming several weeks ago.  The kids at the kinder and elementary schools tend to follow their older siblings at the high schools.  When the big kids take their final exams, they stop going to school and their younger siblings follow suit.

This is a common practice state wide.  I'm not sure why the school calendar isn't adjusted to accommodate this.  Unlike the US, our funding is not tied to attendance.

The positive side of this phenomena is the teachers get several weeks to close up their classrooms and reflect on the year.

The down side is not having a distinct closer for the year.  There are no goodbyes, unless you start in May while the students are still all there, but that seems a bit hollow.

The turnover rate for the ex-pats is high, so they are especially left adrift without the traditional year end goodbye rituals.  They're not complaining, per se, just observing (and living) the difference.

Truthfully, their minds are turned towards home now.  Our official last day of school is July 10th.  The airports will be packed with folks leaving the country from that point on.

The fasting month of Ramadan begins this Sunday, so our school day will be from 9:00 - 1:00.  Folks fasting (most adults) eat a large meal before sunrise and go without food and water all day, until breaking their fast just after sunset with another large meal.  The days are especially long this time of year, so this time can be hard for those fasting.  This is a time of intense prayer, which is evident all around.

We ex-pats are expected to be respectful of this time, making sure we don't eat or drink publicly.

We reminded our teachers that they can not pop popcorn or warm their food in the microwave during this time, so there is no aroma of food.  If they must eat, it has to be behind closed doors.

All food shops in the malls are closed during the day.  There is to be no smell of food that might be tempting to those who are fasting.

Learning about other cultures has been one of the real treats and benefits of living abroad.  In my 2.5 years here, my learning curve has been steep.  In fact, I'd venture to say I've learned more during this time, than at any other time in my life.  It's one thing to visit a place, but it's a whole other ball game to live there and be immersed in the culture.

So, as much as we've been charged with sharing our teaching practices, whether we admit it or not, we're the ones getting educated.

Now though . . .

School's out soon and we're headed home for summer break.

MJ's Covers

Rolling Stone Magazine list the ten best covers of Michael Jackson's songs.  I definitely don't agree with all of their choices, but what is amazing in this list, is the wide-ranging genres.  There's R & B, country, reggae, jazz and everything in between.

Check it out below.

http://www.rollingstone.com/music/pictures/the-10-best-covers-of-michael-jacksons-songs-20140627/mariah-carey-ill-be-there-0379476

Reading

When your child is still a young baby, begin to read to him/her.  That's the word from pediatricians, encouraging parents to make this a habit/routine in their child's life.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/24/parents-read-to-children_n_5522762.html

This simple act makes a huge difference in language and vocabulary development, that is clearly evident when kids start school.

It was incredible how lacking in language so many of our kindergarten students where at my last school as principal.  It was a 100% title 1 school, which means all the students were on the free breakfast and lunch program.  That fact in itself shouldn't matter in regards to kinder readiness, but it did.

With rare exception, the kinders entered school not knowing the alphabet, numbers, colors, etc.  They were a clean slate.  The challenge with that was, they were competing with kids who were extremely well prepared for school.  So, my kids began their educational journey way, way behind, always playing catch up.

What's fascinating to me about the notion of reading to your kids is, this is free.  It doesn't cost a dime.  If you don't have books, the library is full of them, which is why the kinder deficiencies were so disheartening.

Reading to your child makes a huge, positive, lifelong impact.  That's the word that the pediatricians are spreading.  That's the word we should all be sharing.

Happy Reading!
  

Wakes

As a child growing up, I attended a lot of wakes and funerals.  We lived in a small town and knew everyone, and of course we were expected to attend these services. Also, my parents were older and the people in our circle tended to be older, and many died during this time.

To this day, I don't like the color purple, as it reminds me of coffins.  Lilac, and various other shades of purple, was the color of choice for many of the women's.

I mostly went to these services under protest, as I wanted to remember people alive, but the South is steeped in funeral traditions that I was required to respect.

Now, having acknowledged that I prefer to remember people alive, I strongly object to a new trend described below.

There was a recent funeral in New Orleans where the deceased woman is sitting upright with sunglasses on, a beer in one hand, and a cigarette in the other, looking like she's very much alive.  See for yourself below.

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/06/22/us/its-not-the-living-dead-just-a-funeral-with-flair.html?src=me&ref=general&_r=0

Uh . . .

No.

No.

No.

That's just . . .

Creepy.

Creepy.

Creepy.

OK boys.

Here's the deal.

When I'm gone, find the nearest crematory, and tell 'em to fire it up.

Then, gather the family and friends, and throw one heck of a party.  Believe me, I plan to be there in spirit, to make sure all comments are true, and favorable, of course.

That's it.

Simple.

And, most importantly,

Not creepy.

Mama said . . .

The jails/prisons were filled with pretty boys who someone thought was too cute to discipline.

Exhibit #1

Stockton Police Mugshot of Jeremy Meeks

More info can be found on the link below.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/20/hot-convict-jeremy-meeks_n_5515930.html

First Date

This is just too precious.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GiOJuIPl8vE

I Just Discovered . . .

New music from a kid name Sam Smith.  He has a marvelous voice.

Check him out on the iTunes widget on the right.

Side note -

I added a feature where you can sign up for emails, so you'll receive the posts as soon as I publish them.  The up side is you get them right away.  The down side is that it sometimes takes me a minute to catch errors, so those who get it quick, oftentimes have to muddle through the mess.

Your choice.

I'm just thrilled anyone is reading.

Awwwwwwww!

Take a look at these first time daddies with their babies.

Precious.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/12/first-time-dads-and-babies_n_5486253.html?utm_hp_ref=mostpopular

Happy Father's Day

Suicide Watch

This is a sobering TED Talk by a former Highway Patrolman who's beat covered the Golden Gate Bridge.  In it he talks about his experience in dealing with folks who were contemplating suicide on this iconic landmark.

Although its a grim subject, it's presented in such a way that it leaves you hopeful.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/tedtalks/kevin-briggs-ted-suicide_b_5491939.html

Green is the Color of Love . . .

. . . or lust, or something.

It is astonishing the number of Western women who get married while they're over here.

I think there are a number of reasons for this phenomena.

First, there are just so many men.  Now the average age is just north of 12 years old, but these ladies don't mind robbing the cradle.  Second, the reality is very real of going to jail and then getting booted out of the country if you are found to be cavorting with the opposite sex.  Third, loneliness.  These ladies need a man in their lives.  And finally, the highly coveted green card that so many of these young men seek (which I think is the most prevalent reason, whether it is admitted or not).

The guys typically come from very poor countries, and will do anything to better themselves, including (especially) marrying a US Citizen so that they can enter the US legally and gain citizenship.

So, with all of the marriages . . . is it love, or is it the love of the green card?

Me, being the cynic that I am, think that most times it's the later.

Why do I care, you might ask?

Actually, I don't, but I pride myself on being astute and observant in these new surroundings, and these weddings/marriages are pretty amazing to witness.

I know someone who went so far as to convert to Islam in order to expedite the process.

For those guys brave enough to have tried to talk to me, I've quickly reminded them I have shoes older than them.  They come back with age is just a number, and I respond with green is just a color until we're talking green card and a ticket out of here.

Apparently, love is in the air.

Who am I to question it?

Happy Father's Day

As we approach this holiday, here's a shout out to all the fathers out there, especially the newest father in my world, Chris.  I'm so proud of him in this new role that he was tailor-made for.

I'm also remind of my father, who would be 96 this year, if he were alive.

He was the oldest of eight, from an incredibly dysfunctional family.  We lived near them when we were growing up, but my Mom had the presence of mind to limit our exposure to the craziness that was ever present.

Daddy was a hard worker, with an excellent work ethic.  I'm grateful my brothers and I inherited that.

As I've mentioned before, he was illiterate.  His folks made him stay home to work and help raise his brothers and sisters.

His relationship with his own kids was strained and distant.  We had very little direct contact with him even though we lived under the same roof.  We learned early how to stay out his way.  He was a volatile alcoholic, a mean drunk.

My most vivid memories of him involve cleaning up his vomit during his weekend binges.  Believe me when I say it has been an excellent deterrent in keeping me away from drugs and alcohol.  I didn't want to grow up and be like him.

Neither did my brothers.

Truthfully, he had no idea how to be a father.

He worked hard and provided a living as best he could under the circumstances, but beyond that, he had nothing to give.

Thank God, my Mom had a reservoir of common sense, that she dispensed liberally as we were growing up.

My two older brothers had it much harder than Terry and I because by the time we came along much later, he had mellowed out.

Even still, I don't ever remember having a conversation with him . . . ever.  We must have, but honestly, I don't remember.

We all left home as soon as we could and never returned to live.  Once we escaped, there was no desire to return, except to see Mom.

For many years I was angry with him, but I realized he was doing the best he could with his skill set.  So, I moved from anger to pity.  I felt sorry for him.  He missed and mangled so many opportunities.

How did he live with that in his old age? Were there regrets? Did he know how we felt about him?  Did he care?

So, Father's Day brings mixed emotions.  I'm sad about my own father, but I'm so grateful for the fathers that Ben and Frankie have become.

They have broken this generational curse, and for that I'm so very grateful and so very proud.

Happy Father's Day.

It's On!

Kudos to the California judge who declared that the laws governing the hiring, firing and tenure of teachers in that state are unconstitutional.  It is a system that has protected grossly ineffective teachers because getting rid of them is such an incredibly long and drawn out process.  In the best case scenarios, it takes a minimum of two years to get rid of incompetent teachers, but in most cases, it takes much longer than that.

Check out the article below.

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/06/12/opinion/in-california-a-judge-takes-on-teacher-tenure.html?hp&rref=opinion

This is my gripe with the teachers' union.

If they are fighting for more pay, I would be right there with them.  But when they are protecting teachers that they wouldn't allow their kids near, then I had a problem with that.

I know about this issue first hand.

In my first year as principal, there was a teacher on my staff who was so inept, it was criminal that she was allowed on a school campus, let alone in a classroom teaching kids.

But the kicker was, she had been teaching for 18 years (!!!) at this point.  Believe me when I say she didn't just get incompetent in her later years.  You see, I was a substitute teacher at this school and knew her back in the day.  Seven years later, I returned to the same school as principal.

In order to fire a poor teacher, you have to document, document, document.  It's tedious and time consuming, but it was a task I was willing to take on.  Armed with several years of write ups from previous administrators who had started the dismissal process, these was compiled and treated as one year.  I was then charged with consistently documenting her actions that year, in order to move forward with dismissal.  With the extraordinary help from my supervisors, and the attorney for the district, we were successful in removing this teacher my first year as principal.

Thank God, we were triumphant, but it just shouldn't be this hard.

Then, there is the other issue with the new teachers, who are last hired, but are first fired each year.  I had some amazing brand new teachers who brought energy, enthusiasm, and creativity to the job, but each year they were released.  Some found jobs at other schools.  Others were discouraged and went to other districts, and many just left the profession altogether.

In the four years at my last principalship at one of the poorest schools in Sacramento, I lost half of my staff each year.  It was virtually impossible to move forward with school-wide initiatives because staff continuity was non-existent.

That was criminal, too.

So, for all those folks who would defend the current practices tooth and nail, shame on them for protecting teachers that they wouldn't dare let teach their own kids.

If they're not good enough for their kids, they shouldn't be good enough for any kid.

So, right on Judge.

I hope this is the beginning of a tidal wave of change in education as we know it.

Drug Mule

The New York Times has a fascinating story of a 90 year-old man who transported drugs and drug money throughout the US for years without detection.  His is not the face that is usually associated with this illegal activity.  Probably why he got away with it for so long.

The article is lengthy, but well worth the read.

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/06/15/magazine/the-sinaloa-cartels-90-year-old-drug-mule.html?hp

Really Cool Service

A company called Kitestring, offers a service where you let them know you're going out, say to meet someone for the first time,  and you give parameters on when you should be finished.  If you don't check in at the appointed time, either to respond or extend the time, it starts to SMS folks you have listed as contacts.

Kudos to Alisha for sharing this.

https://www.kitestring.io 

Revolutionary!

This video clip shows an innovative way to clear a clogged drain.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/10/pongtu-toilet-unclogging-plastic-wrap_n_5477564.html

Home Growing

This tiny space becomes a multifunctional workhorse.  Check out the video clip below.  It's less than two minutes long.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/03/tiny-apartment-mit-cityhome_n_5438617.html

Nice Rides

Check out the fleet of police cars for Dubai, beginning with the most expensive car in the world, the Bugatti Veyron.

I wonder if this is one of the reasons why many of the little boys want to be policemen when they grow up.

http://autos.aol.com/article/dubai-police-drive-the-worlds-fastest-police-car/?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmaing11%7Cdl17%7Csec1_lnk3%26pLid%3D484806

TED Goes to Prison

You know how much I love TED Talks, and with the article, I love them even more.

Check out the link below that describes an innovative prison in California where more than 1200 of the inmates have earned college degrees.

Amazing!

TED took their cameras into the prison and the stories that are shared are powerful.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/scott-budnick/something-extraordinary-i_b_5438191.html

There are four videos in this link.  If you're pressed for time, choose the 2nd and 3rd. They're five minutes each.  The first one is an interview of Sir Richard Branson, and it's rather long at 18 minutes, but I thought it was interesting that he hires ex-cons in his businesses and encourages others to do so. The last video is of a woman who works at the prison and her talk is on forgiveness, after her son was brutally murdered.

My recommendations for the viewing order of the videos:  2nd, 3rd, 4th, and 1st

Enjoy.

Yikes!

A kid doodles on his dad's passport causing them to get stuck in a foreign land.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/02/dad-passport-doodle_n_5429605.html

Sometimes You Win, Sometimes the Bear Wins

You gotta love this critter.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/31/bear-in-a-hammock-daytona-beach_n_5424012.html

Music Makes Gardening/Life Fun

As evidence below.

http://www.salon.com/2014/05/30/these_farmers_turned_blackstreets_no_diggity_into_an_organic_gardening_anthem/?source=newsletter

Classy Response

I had seen, but not read the emails that prompted this response, but Stanford's provost did a great job in responding to it.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/30/stanford-snapchat-email-response_n_5419628.html

Really Clever

Check out how these artful pieces blend in with their surroundings.

http://www.boredpanda.com/street-art-interacts-with-surroundings.

Hat tip to Forrest.

Cat People are Smarter

There was never any doubt in my mind.

Check out the study below.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/29/cat-people-dog-people-intelligence_n_5412245.html

Priceless Wisdom

“Never make someone a priority when all you are to them is an option.” - Maya Angelou

My Favorite

I'm not a fan of poetry.  Never have been.  Most of the time it takes too much work to figure out what the author is trying to say.

"Dude, just spit it out in plain English," is my usual response.

I know.

I know.

This shines a light on my ignorance and my country ways, but it is a truth I speak about myself.

Anyway, one of the poems that dispels everything I dislike about this genre is by Dr. Maya Angelou.

Enjoy the strength, and the passion of her words.



STILL I RISE

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may tread me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you? 
Why are you beset with gloom? 
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken? 
Bowed head and lowered eyes? 
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you? 
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you? 
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs? 

Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise. 

California vs. Texas

Really?

There is no contest.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2014/05/29/its-no-contest-california-really-is-better-than-texas/?hpid=z10

This article comparing the two states is fascinating to me, being a native Texan who lived in California for more than twenty years.

But here's the dilemma.

Do I claim California and deny the influence that Texas has had on my life?  Like surviving Jim Crow and the horrors of the segregated South. Or, do I claim Texas and forget the joys of living in the trendsetting, forward-thinking Golden State?

What do you think?

In Honor of Dr. Maya

Phenomenal Woman

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkYh2BYONms

May she rest in peace.

Hat tip to Fahizah.

I Love the New York Post!

I love them for this article on Kim and Kanye's wedding.  It's quick and dirty and oh so to the point.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/25/new-york-post-kimye-wedding_n_5389559.html

My sentiments exactly.

Really, who cares about these self-absorbed people?

Hair

Hair is highly esteemed in this culture.  Although you can't see it because it's always covered up, women are expected to keep their hair long.

Typically babies heads are shaved as newborns, and unlike other cultures like India, I don't think it's done for religious reasons, but rather, to encourage growth.  By the time they're school-aged, the little girls' hair is down to their waists.  By the time they're in fourth grade, they are required to cover it up.

A couple of months ago, I got a really short hair cut.  I wore it this short many years ago when I first started working.  The impetus for this change was the heat in Vietnam.  That heat, coupled with the humidity, was unbearable.  I also knew that experience was foreshadowing the heat to come here, although we don't have the humidity, thank God.  However, once you get past 100 degrees, hot is hot.

Well, folks thought I had lost my mind.  They could not believe I chopped off all of my hair willfully.  It really is seen as a woman's crowning glory, so to cut it like this is blasphemous.

Now, the saving grace is that I'm American.  I sometimes think we're seen as the wayward child.  You know the kid you look at and shake your head at his/her antics, but love him/her just the same.  As long as what we're doing is not seen as disrespectful of the culture, we're OK.

An example of disrespect would be to wear something that did not cover you up from top to bottom.  Chances are, you'd be asked to change.

Anyway, back to my hair.

One of the first things I did when I got divorced was cut it.  Frank always wanted it long, and being the dutiful wife that I was, I wore it that way.  Cutting it was liberating. Never again would I allow someone else to dictate how I look, what I wear, or anything else in my life.

My mantra is . . . if you like me, wonderful.  If you don't, that's OK, too.  Life is too short, so move on to someone that you do like.

Me . . . I'm OK with myself.  I like me, and quite frankly, that's all that matters.

Here's to living the life you want to live.

Take it from me, it's a blast.

From Inmate to CEO

What a powerful message this is!

This guy was in prison for four years, recognized a need while there, and when he got out, proceeded to produce a solution to the problem.

Be sure to watch the three minute video.  You may have to click it a couple of times for it to come on.

Inspiring.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/23/federal-prison-system_n_5379840

The Help

Mellody Hobson, who is CEO of an investment firm, tells of being mistaken for the help in 2006.  She has a powerful message on becoming "color brave" in this TED Talk.

Check it out below.

http://www.upworthy.com/an-executive-got-mistaken-for-kitchen-help-but-instead-of-getting-angry-she-turned-it-into-this?c=upw1

Good Strategy

This football team is targeting college grads in their recruitment.  That a change from the police blotter that many seem to use.

http://online.wsj.com/news/articles/SB10001424052702304422704579572050338722302?mg=reno64-wsj&utm_source=Daily+Skimm&utm_campaign=dded1988f8-daily_skimm&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_74efee6205-dded1988f8-24014177

Not Happy

These Iranians dancing to Pharrell Williams' song "Happy," have been arrested.

Sad.

http://www.theroot.com/blogs/the_grapevine/2014/05/iranian_authorities_jail_singers_for_being_happy.html?wpisrc=newsletter_jcr:content&mc_cid=f0f4a4abce&mc_eid=ac9b7800d4

School Program

My school has an EXPO today and tomorrow, showcasing student work from this year.  It is an opportunity for community members and families to see some of the students' accomplishments.  There is a large room that is housing all of the artifacts, that are presented by grade level.  The photos below don't do it justice.  It really is very nice.

The culminating activities for our guests were a musical program, a tour of the exhibition hall, ending with a catered meal.

This is our orchestra.  It was the first time I had seen them perform.  They were terrific!  Interestingly, it is mixed with boys and girls.  This school is more progressive in that regard.  Also note the two young ladies who are serving refreshments.  This is their primary job at school, to make and serve tea and coffee.  They also help with clerical duties.  The men in the audience are our guests, and are sitting directly in front of the stage.  They are wearing traditional dress and military uniforms.  The women are sitting to the right of the stage.  We are always separated from the men. The students are wearing their regular uniforms - the girls have on long green dresses with white shaylas (the head scarves).  The boys are wearing the gandooras (the long white robes) with the traditional head dress, the keffiyeh.

These are some of our younger boys performing karate drills.  The gentleman directing them is one of our PE teachers.

Side note - We have an olympic size pool, and all of our kids second through fifth grade, rotate through swimming classes twice a week.  The pool is open to mothers one night a week, and the one time I visited, it was chock full of mommas.  They were completely covered with bathing suits that look like wet suits.  Really cool to see.

You may have noticed the auditorium is almost empty.  There are about sixty fifth grade girls watching the performance, but I didn't get a shot of them.  The other classes will be invited to see the performance tomorrow, when the mothers are visiting.  We didn't want any distractions from kids in the audience today.

The little girls out front are modestly dressed.  At my previous school, they would have been in evening gowns, with full makeup for something like this.

 Here's another selection from the choir.

I hope you've enjoyed this slice of my world.

Experiencing the World

Ben has a buddy that runs an organization called Global Glimpse that takes high school kids on immersion trips to Central and South America.  What an eye-opening experience for these kids.

Check it out below, and please share this info.  This is an opportunity of a lifetime for these kids.

http://matadornetwork.com/bnt/15-things-youth-need-thrive-america-1-unexpected-way-get/

Lemons

Here are a bunch of uses for lemons, most of which I had not heard of.

Here's to enlightenment.

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/1hsVer

Great Movie!

I finally saw "12 Years a Slave," the Academy Award Best Picture Winner.  It is a great movie, but tough to watch.  I was sitting on the edge of my seat the entire time, knowing that unspeakable atrocities could be/would be in every scene.

We've come a long way, for sure.

What is most amazing is that a movie displaying so much truth about this hellaciously evil time in our history, would be recognized as the best picture of the year.

I was reminded as recently as in today's newspaper, that people are oftentimes sent to prison now for mistreating animals, and yet not long ago, when people were savagely beaten, with the flesh ripped from their bodies, just cause, there were no consequences whatsoever.

NONE.

I was also reminded of the slave labor that built this country into the great land that it is, and how the effects of that warped, single-minded, single-benefactor system are still very much evident today.

How can you not be advantaged when you reap the benefits of centuries of preferential treatment in land ownership and jobs?

How can folks, in good conscience, fight against affirmative action (which amounts to a bone being thrown our way), when they have been the recipients of untold advantages for generations?

So, as much as I appreciated the making of this movie, and the spreading of this message, it brings an uneasiness about my writings about forgiveness to the forefront.

I know.

I know.

We must forgive these unspeakable, hateful, vengeful, murderous people/episodes in our history, but it's no easy task when our children are still being gunned down for posing 'imaginary' threats to murderous, gun-toting state-sponsored vigilantes.

Yes.

We've come a long way, but dear God, we still have miles to go.

The Power of a Tweet

I'm not a fan of most social media.  I'm not on Facebook, and wouldn't know how to tweet if my life depended on it. But, when used for good, these tools can provide the platform to become a powerful force.

Check out an example of this below.

http://www.salon.com/2014/05/16/saudi_arabian_boy_tweets_about_hospitalization_and_it_became_the_most_retweeted_message_ever_in_saudi_arabia/?source=newsletter

Go Boise State!

They petitioned the NCAA to help a homeless recruit, and amazingly, the NCAA granted a waiver.

Go NCAA, too!

http://www.aol.com/article/2014/05/14/boise-state-gets-ok-to-help-homeless-player/20886059/?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl33%7Csec1_lnk3%26pLid%3D47675

Hat tip to Forrest.

The Best is Yet to Come

This proves it.

http://www.upworthy.com/know-any-overachievers-that-are-upset-over-not-yet-doing-something-great-show-them-this?c=upw1

Happy Mother's Day!

To all of you fabulous Moms out there, here's hoping your day was filled with lots of love and fond memories.

To Houran, the newest mom in my world, congratulations on your first's Mother's Day.  Leila is one blessed little lady to have you as her mom.  If it's possible, you're even more amazing at motherhood than I thought you would be.

To Lupe, thank you for the gift of Milu.  What a darling sweetie pie!  I could not be prouder of you and the example that you're setting for her as a strong woman who stands up for what is right.

To Cara, thank you for Zadie.  Thank you, too, for welcoming me into your world and allowing me the absolute joy of being a grandma.  I'm bursting with pride at the way you are raising Zadie, as I'm watching her grow up into this amazing little lady.

Happy Mother's Day!

With love,

Faye/Aunt Faye/Grandma Faye 

Annual College Visits

New York Times article -

(http://www.nytimes.com/2014/05/11/opinion/sunday/advice-for-a-troubled-teen.html?hpw&rref=opinion&_r=0)

This article in today's paper, took me back to my first year as principal.  I had four boys - two African-American, and two Latino - who were natural leaders.  They ruled the playground.  Unfortunately, they were not always leading in the right direction.  In fact, most times they were spearheading the trouble.

Although these boys were only 5th and 6th graders, I knew they were already at a crossroad in their lives.  I decided that we would take them on two field trips.  First, to the local Juvenile Hall, then to Stanford University.  I told them their choices would determine whether they would be headed to jail or to college.  Interestingly enough, after years and lots of effort, we were never granted permission to visit Juvenile Hall because of privacy concerns.  But we did visit Stanford.  We went there because Ben was a student, and I wanted these boys to see someone who looked like them on this college campus.

We expanded the program to three carloads the next year, and then after that we decided to take a busload to experience college for a day.

As I said, we began with Stanford, with Ben as our tour guide, then we added UC Berkeley, UC Davis, and Sac State (our local university).  We took the trips in late Spring, allocating a day for each school.

These trips required dedicated chaperones.  I was always blessed with a great staff who was willing to do whatever they could to help our students.  Cathy took over the planning, and bought incredible organizational skills and a cohesiveness to these excursions.  Her guidance and help were invaluable.

We went on these trips every year that I was principal.

One of the most memorable ones was a visit to UC Berkeley where my dear friend Ray was teaching.  He invited our kids to sit in on one of his classes.  They listened to the discussion for about a half hour, and then Ray invited our students to comment and/or ask questions.  To my utter amazement, they had lots to contribute and they did great!  I was so proud of them.

On another visit to Berkeley, there were about a half dozen protestors who were living in a grove of trees that was scheduled for demolition to expand the athletic center.  Our kids were fascinated by their commitment to their cause, and by the buckets they used to send down their bodily fluids.  Set up nearby, was a table with baked goods that these folks offered our students.  We suspected they were made with illegal herbs and quickly moved our kids along.  All I needed was for a student to eat a brownie laced with marijuana.  Thankfully, we escaped incident, and left with just a quirky story to tell.

I'd like to say these college visits made an impact, but truth be told, I don't know.

So much of the fruit of what we do as educators is not reaped until years later,  so I hold out hope that  of the scores of kids who went on these special field trips, it helped someone.

There was no appreciable difference in the behavior of the first four boys, and at least two of them chose the wrong path.  I'm glad it was a while before I got that news.  It would probably have impacted our decision to continue to do this year after year.

Although I don't regret the time, energy, effort and money it took to do this, it saddens me when I think of the lost potential.  How many kids would have had a greater chance if they had the support they needed?  How many bright, talented kids, who, in spite of our best efforts, still fell by the wayside?  Was there more we/I could have done?

As an educator, these are the questions that haunt me.

Vodka . . . Really?

Here's some pretty crazy options for household cleaning, including vodka to clean mattresses.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/08/cleaning-hacks-spring-cleaning-shortcuts_n_5242987.html

My College Experience

I went to an HBCU (an Historically Black College and University), Florida A & M University in Tallahassee.  I followed Forrest there, and Terry followed me.  Terry was a year older than me, but he went to the Air Force first, for four years, and then entered FAMU.

I will forever be grateful to Forrest for making it his life's mission to get me out of China, Texas (our hometown) and off to his alma mater.  The fact that he was able to persuade our Mom to let me go was nothing short of a miracle.

Prior to leaving for college, I had only traveled out of state once as a very young child, when we went to San Francisco to visit my mother's brother, her only sibling, and then a couple of other times when we visited relatives in Louisiana.

Leaving home was a big deal.

HUGE.

Folks in my neck of the woods didn't leave home.

But with Forrest's help, I left Texas, heading first to Miami, where he was living. We then drove north for 500 miles to my new home at FAMU.

I was . . .

Excited.

Scared.

Anxious.

Worried.

Thrilled.

These were just some of the emotions I was experiencing with each passing mile of that trip.

There were no visits to the campus prior to entering school to check it out.  Forrest gave it his stamp of approval, and that was good enough for me.  I knew he wouldn't steer me wrong.

The campus was/is beautiful.  It sits on rolling hills and it's luscious greenery is a warm, welcoming site.  It has a down home flavor, a large dose of southern hospitality.

In contrast, China, Texas is barren on so many levels, with a population of 1100 folks. When I arrived on FAMU's campus with an enrollment of 5000, and all of them Black, it was a shock to my system.  A pleasant one, but a shock nonetheless.  I had never seen so many black folks in all of my life.  There were 10 black kids in my graduating class of 100.

This trip down memory land was prompted by an article I just read in the New York Times, by Charles Blow, one of the columnists, where he was reminiscing about his experiences at Grambling State University, in Louisiana, also an HBCU, and how nurturing it was.

Here's the link:  http://www.nytimes.com/2014/05/08/opinion/blow-in-college-nurturing-matters.html?hp&rref=opinion&_r=0

My experience mirrored his.

My professors had a vested interest in my success.  If I succeeded, they succeeded. If I failed, they had failed me, and that was not going to happen.

It was refreshing on a social level, too.  As I imagined it is at an all-boys' or all-girls' school, there were things we had in common that didn't require an explanation or discussion.  We could launch into conversations without fear of alienating anyone, or offending someone with our views.  Not to imply we were monolithic in the way we saw the world, but our common denominator helped us to move more easily pass our differences as we navigated this new world.

I wanted very much for Ben and Frankie to attend an HBCU, but they had other ideas.  To be fair, the world that they were raised in was radically different from mine. I'm not at all sure they would have been comfortable in an all-black setting.

Truthfully, that bothered/bothers me.

In our quest to send them to the best schools, did we inadvertently rob them of rich cultural experiences?

That's one of the many lingering questions that I don't have the answer to.  Or maybe I do, but I don't like what it is, so I keep it in the question column.

Side note - This is the 40th anniversary of my high school graduation.

Good gravy!

Anyway.

Thanks for taking this walk down memory lane with me.

I hope all is well in your world.

Can I Hear an Amen?

I know some folks who might not appreciate this.

That's OK.

I love it!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/07/characters-from-bible-really-look-like-_n_5281519.html?utm_hp_ref=black-voices&ir=Black%20Voices

Singing One of Frank's Songs

Incredible!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/05/angelina-jordan-fly-me-to-the-moon_n_5267341.html

Another "WOW!"

Check out this young lady's amazing achievement and note why her parents encouraged their kids to take college courses while still in high school.

http://www.theroot.com/articles/culture/2014/05/meet_the_16_year_old_who_will_graduate_college_before_high_school.html?wpisrc=newsletter_jcr:content&mc_cid=d578c0c540&mc_eid=ac9b7800d4

A Tribute to His Mom

This is just over a minute long, but it is oh so touching.

http://www.theroot.com/articles/culture/2014/05/watch_kevin_durant_s_emotional_mvp_speech_to_his_mother.html?wpisrc=newsletter_jcr:content&mc_cid=d3ba4a4451&mc_eid=ac9b7800d4

Channeling Chris Tucker

These guys end their dance with some Chris Tucker moves.

Really cute.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/02/michael-fassbender-dancing-blurred-lines_n_5256372.html?utm_hp_ref=entertainment

How to Choose a Winner

Check out the link below to an interesting documentary on one of the biggest disappointments in football drafts, the 1998 one involving Peyton Manning vs. Ryan Leaf for the top draft position.   This examines the art and science of choosing a winner.

It's 12 minutes long.

Fascinating.

http://www.nytimes.com/video/us/100000002859989/picking-a-winner-the-1998-nfl-draft.html?playlistId=100000002148738

Beautiful Black Ballerinas

Simply stunning!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/02/black-ballerinas-misty-copeland-pointe-magazine-june-july-2014_n_5255148.html

What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger

This is an article about the young woman who starred in "Precious."  We should all take a page from her book.  She has a powerful message.

http://www.salon.com/2014/05/02/gabourey_sidibe_dont_ask_me_why_im_confident_ask_rihanna/

A Really Smart Athlete

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/tim-morehouse/meet-john-urschel-the-sma_b_5248272.html?utm_hp_ref=black-voices&ir=Black%20Voices

Black Barbershops

I love black barbershops.  I spent lots of time in them with Ben and Frankie growing up.  The conversations are unusually interesting, and in an hour to two, the world's problems are typically solved.

Jimmy Kimmel visited one recently to get the guys' take on the Donald Sterling debacle.  Check it out below.

http://blackamericaweb.com/2014/05/01/kimmel-hits-up-black-barbershop-to-discuss-donald-sterling-watch/

Cheers to Tremendous Academic Success!

This kid is headed for more great things, after achieving a 5.0 GPA and 2100 on the SAT.

Incredible!

Bravo to Ellen for showcasing this gifted young man.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/04/30/ivy-league-ellen-degeneres_n_5237288.html?utm_hp_ref=black-voices

Seeing Without Glasses

This quick video shows you what to do to see something in a pinch if you've forgotten your glasses or contacts.

Truly amazing!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OydqR_7_DjI#t=155